Antilag

Random rubbish from the motor sport world

Friday, November 4, 2016

Of Rally Sponsorship and fakes

It has come to our attention that lesser rally teams have stolen our idea of personal sponsorship of WRC cars. Such teams that have vastly higher budgets and spend money on Expresso coffee machines and nail manicures – while we at Alliance Motorsport, we put YOUR money to more important things that a rally car requires – like petrol and tyres. And if we are lucky, a bag of lollies to hand out to officials.

As such, we urge you to forgo spending money on other teams and to give it to us, the team that built a WRC2 car in a garage, fuelled by dreams, hot air and posting on Facebook when we needed to put a gearbox in at 2am in the morning. Our necessary fuel (Monster Energy Drink, pizza and infusions of tea direct into the biggest vein we could access) have only allowed us to go so far, while we will get to Coffs Harbour, we are alarmed that these urgent supplies are running low, let alone we are needing to mug beggars for spare change for tyres.

So how about it? Sponsor a genuine garage built WRC Bad Boys WRC2 Tank, help the team with no budget, no clue and no caffeine. And also unlike other teams, we’ll allow to not justput your name on our conveyance, but in a form you want – we’ll accept anything that will (hopefully) pass FIA scrutiny. Unfortunatly that means no DickButt but anything else? Your love of Anime? How I am the greatest Bird known to Humankind and I should be the Dictactor of the USA? Cats Rule, Dogs drool? Absolutly!

So for the measly sum of 20 bucks, get your name on a rallycar mister, be part of the Orginal WRC Bad Boys team. 100 bucks on the underside in case the car rolls at a spectactor point for maximum publicity.

And also fuel the team to the finish line because Lord Knows, if Cat Interceptor don’t get his tea while being the Overlord of the Service Park, blood is going to be spilt. Probably his own as he falls off his bike but you get the point, if we don’t get our caffeine, there will be carnage and hijinks and undies forgotten! There will be laminations of women and children, grown men shall bow their heads in horror and I, Greenie, shall rise up and strike down the unworthy who are scared of dust and night!

For I, Greenie, will make Rally Great again! I shall build a wall and it shall keep out hipsters and enviromentalists! It will be beautiful and huge! And I shall laugh and Group B will sound in the forests once aga…..

Wait, what was I supposed to talking about? Hmmm okay not evil plans ….. ah right Sponsor the WRC Bad Boys, the first and best put your name on the side of our car!

Greenie
Evil Overlord of the UnHoly Alliannce

posted by admin at 9:03 am  

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